"4 Ways to Make Him Commit"
NOTE: Does he love you,
doesn't seem to be interested in the long-term? It shouldn't be a
lose-lose situation -- you simply need to learn certain skills and
personality traits that actually ENCOURAGE him to commit! And you can
learn these special secrets in my new program, 77
Secrets of Love, which you can
TODAY by clicking the link below!
We'll be answering a reader e-mail today! This one comes from "Michele," and she has a problem that a lot of smart, attractive women encounter today.
Michele has a man who seems to do everything that a good boyfriend/husband should, except the most important thing -- totally commit to her!
Let's make ourselves comfy and read through Michele's e-mail.
Hope you are fine. I love reading your articles, but I'm a bit confused when I apply your tips to my relationship. I would like to know if you can help me on that. Well, I have no idea what type of man I'm dealing with -- I don't know if he's the secure type, or the emotionally-unavailable type. Let me explain.
He's a very nice guy with a kind heart. We were in the same class at University for 3 years, but we were not that close back then. However, during our last University year in 2009, we started getting close and see each other. He's always there for me whenever I needed support. He always wants to make me happy.
However, he hasn't told me his feelings yet, but he behaves as if he likes me. Almost everyday, we talk for hours on Skype, and while at work, we chat or phone a bit. Then in the evening, we talk on Skype before going to sleep. Sometimes we fall asleep together while talking!
Well, this has been going on for one year. We even meet to have sex once a month, but I didn't have sex with him early. I did it with him some 5 months after we started to become close, because I wanted to make sure that he developed a deep bond with me before we had sex.
He's always there for me when I need him, and we talk everyday on Skype. But the problem is that, even after one year, he still hasn't told me his feelings yet. Does he want a long-term relationship or not? And yes, I have feelings for him.
Sometimes I make myself unavailable by not returning his calls (I do this on purpose so that he chases after me and doesn't get bored), and it does work. But he still hasn't told me his feelings yet, and this gets me worried. I don't know where I am going, and I don't want to get hurt again.
I don't know if he's occupied with his career, because he just got a new job this month, but he's not happy with the pay. Maybe he's waiting to get a good job and get enough money to meet my parents?
By the way, he confides in me. He tells his smallest problems because he trusts me, and I always support him. He doesn't cheat on me, and I don't cheat on him as well.
Alexandra, sometimes he's not romantic. Sometimes he doesn't hold my hand and all that. But he calls me "baby," "cherie." and other terms of endearment. And I know he's no liar.
Anyway, I love your articles. They're great. But if you could help me to solve my problem, I would be very happy.
Thanks for your e-mail, Michele! And thanks for being a faithful member of my mailing list. My first piece of advice is to keep reading my articles, over and over if you can -- if you look closely enough, you'll find the solutions to practically any relationship problem you may encounter!
Now here's my "tailor-made" advice for you, as well as for everyone else who may be experiencing the exact same problem as you are:
#1 - Don't think of commitment too much!
Michele, I'm pretty sure he's thinking about the future as much as you are.
But remember this ONE IMPORTANT THING about men -- they don't have a "schedule" for their relationships.
Unlike women, they don't think there's a "deadline" for taking the relationship to the next level. They'd much rather take their time and make sure everything's in place first before they ask you to marry them.
Take it easy! Enjoy the relationship while you still can, and keep finding tips in my articles, e-books, and especially my audio programs, to "spice up" the relationship every now and then.
#2 - Always try to delay sex UNTIL he's totally sure about you.
Michele, I commend you for delaying sex with him for five whole months, using the time to develop a strong emotional foundation for the two of you. I'm pretty sure it's what made him stay with you until now.
But ideally -- and this goes out to all my readers -- you'll have to wait until he REALLY falls in love with you before you take things to the bedroom. I'm talking the kind of love that REALLY makes a guy want to marry you as soon as he can!
But I'm not worried. I've seen some of my readers delay sex for as little as three months, and still went on to enjoy lasting, fulfilling, nurturing relationships with the men in their lives.
#3 - Give him time to get his act together.
If there's one thing I've learned about the good men out there, it's that they take their careers VERY seriously.
After all, it's going to pay the bills, put food on the table, and buy diapers eventually.
Michele, I think he's still pretty much getting his life in line right now, since you said he's currently unhappy with his job.
Which leads me to my fourth tip:
#4 - Don't meddle, but do get more involved.
It's all about approaching problems in a positive way.
Instead of directly suggesting a better job or business to go into, perhaps you can ask him what kind of career he'd like to pursue if money, time, and effort wasn't an issue. (His answers may surprise even himself!)
Instead of directly asking him about settling down together, you can simply tell him that you love him and that you're looking forward to a happy future. (It's a much gentler way to nudge him in the right direction.)
Encourage him to enjoy what makes HIM happy. Trust me. He'll take you along for the ride.
Michele, to answer your question, I'm pretty sure he's NOT emotionally-unavailable. In fact, he sounds pretty secure in his love for you! It's just that he needs to get a few other problems (such as his financial problems) out of the way first before he can fully, completely focus on you.
Again, I can't say it enough -- keep reading my articles and e-books, and keep listening to my audio programs. All the answers are there!
I'd love to hear from you again, Michele, especially when the relationship finally works out (as I really do expect it to)!
And for my other readers, if you're having problems about a non-committed boyfriend, then I invite you to do what I'd like Michele to do. Take the first step to your solution by listening to my 77 Secrets of Love.
Don't let fear and uncertainty ruin your relationship. Learn the ways, take control, and enjoy a relationship that's TRULY meant to last.
- - -> Get all the answers HERE! <- - -
To the happiness you deserve,
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