Dear Ladies,

It’s the question as old as time:
What is he thinking?

Men can be the most confusing creatures.
Just when you think you have them
figured out, they throw you a curve
ball! Do any of these scenarios seem

He seems to be headed into a serious
relationship with you and then the next
day he wants to take things slow.

He swears he is in love with you but he
can’t stop checking out other women.

He wants to play the field even though
he says you are the best thing that ever
happened to him.

He refuses to talk about things but when
you make a decision without him, he gets

Things get hot and heavy and you wind up
in bed…but after a few weeks he drops
you cold-turkey and you never hear from
him again.

Let’s be honest, ladies: sometimes,
men can seem like real jerks. They do
things that seem to make no sense. They
can seem like a 12-year-old trapped in a
man’s body.

But by understanding the way men think,
we can “get” them in a way we
haven’t before.

Make no mistake: There are some men who
ARE jerks. Those are the men that should
be left in the dust! But if you have
found a good man who just needs a little
more understanding, you’re in luck!

These tips and ideas can help you
understand how men think.


This is always going to happen. Men will
always notice women.

It doesn’t matter what they have at
home. You could be a supermodel! You
could be the richest woman in the
country! You could be the perfect woman!

Men will still notice someone else.
You can get upset. You can cry about it.
You can scream at him for being

He will still do it.

He will apologize and beg for
forgiveness. He can tell you it was not
a big deal.

But he will still do it.

Here’s why: Men are hard-wired to see
women in a sexual sense. It’s not
something they consciously do. It is so
deeply ingrained in them over centuries
that they can’t overcome it, even if
they tried.

They will notice legs. Cleavage gets
their attention. A tiny waist can turn
their head.

But it does NOT mean they don’t want
you! Men do these things without
thinking. The vast majority of the time,
he really, honestly, truly does NOT
realize he’s doing it!

How can you battle this?

Play up your sexiness! Show more
cleavage. Wear high heels to show off
your gorgeous legs. Find out what he
likes and play it up to the hilt!

It won’t stop him from looking at
other women. Nothing can do that.
But it will give him plenty of incentive
to notice you, too. It will spice things
up, and everybody loves a little spice!


How many times has this happened to you:
You drop hints about that great new
restaurant. He never takes you there.

You mention that you would love to get
flowers at work. They never show up.
You ask him to go to a play with you. On
the night of the play, he “forgot”
he was busy and never shows up.

You ask him to take out the trash and
two days later, it is still sitting

ARGH! It’s so annoying!

You know what I’m talking about.
You’ve been there!

Men have a tendency to let things go in
one ear and out the other. They don’t
sweat the small stuff. What might seem
like a big deal to you doesn’t seem
like a deal at all to them.

It isn’t that he’s not listening. He
is! He just doesn’t immediately
realize what is important and what is

And let’s face it: men rarely pick up
on subtle hints. They often need to be
hit upside the head with a clue-by-four
in order to get the picture!

You can remedy this in two ways:

First, stay subtle, but mention it
often. You want flowers? Mention it
every few days. Make the idea stick in
his head and see what happens.

Second, you can be blunt. Tell him you
want flowers. Ask him if he might send
you a bouquet one day. The clearer you
are, the more it will stick!


This is a very big point about how men
think. They need to be in control of
their life and the world around them.

They get nervous, anxious and resentful
if they are not in control of those

The fastest way to turn a man off is to
tell him what to do!

He wants to talk to you. He wants to
know what is on your mind. But he
doesn’t want to have to do something
just because you feel a certain way.

Men want to be in control of their own
lives. It is the alpha male in them.
They are masters of their domain and
kings of their castle!

Tell him what to do and you will push
him away.

Take those three little words, for
example: “I love you.”

A man might want to say that to you. He
might feel those emotions. But if you
are waiting and hoping for it and making
it clear that you need the next step, he
might back off and not say it – even
if he feels it!


Men do this because they don’t want to
feel controlled. Being controlled means
giving up a part of themselves. So they
avoid it at all costs.

But I know what you’re thinking:
“If I don’t TELL him what I want or
need, he won’t get it! He doesn’t
get subtle!”

That’s where a delicate dance comes
in. You have to balance what YOU need
with the control HE needs to have.
It’s not an easy situation to be in!

This is where you choose your battles.
If it matters to you, tell him.

If it doesn’t matter to you, let it

It’s easier said than done. But it can
be done! It takes time and effort, and
it starts with figuring out how his mind
works. Knowing how men think can go a
long way toward getting what you want!


Here is the biggest piece of advice I
can give you:

He will never think the same way you do.

Start by understanding how he thinks,
and then you can find a way to meet in
the middle.

Are you ready to understand him in a way
you never have before?

Are you tired of dealing with the
questions and complications that make
you wonder if you know him at all?

Don’t despair! You can figure out how
he thinks. I can help you.

Get Inside His Mind

To the happiness you deserve,
~Alexandra Fox


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